Feeling a Little Better & a Little Worse March 31, 2012

Better:

Being spring break and all, I finally bit the dust and conquered three rooms of my house. The kitchen, living room and bathroom are CLEAN, yo! My mom came on Thursday and pulled out the appliances and whatnot in the kitchen and got it really clean, even in the “invisible” spaces. Then she helped me flip over my heavy arse living room furniture, so we could clean under there, too. I found ALL the missing toys. Poor Bert’s been under there since Thanksgiving! So, I feel so much better about the house. It no longer feels like this:

 

Also, I did go food shopping and bought the stuff to make five of the Pinterest meals I was salivating over the most. So far one was awful and two were great. When these meals are gone, I’m going to start my juice fast. The hubs is in complete agreement on this plan. So, next week I’ll be back on the juice wagon.

 

I think I mentioned that I stopped the Arava. Which was the breeding un-friendly drug. We have decided to still spend a couple of months actively preventing, then we’ll re-address. Or, as I like to phrase it, we should have listened to Mrs. Gamgee in the first darn place!

 

Worse:

Holy sickballs, Batman! I freaking hate being sick. I have been sick less than normal, though, what with not interacting with the public on the daily anymore and actually building some kind of immune system with my juicer. But, this latest bug got me and Baby G square in the ears, nose and throat. He was really bad for a couple of days (wouldn’t eat of drink, getting on the verge of needing IV fluids), but thankfully forcing water and medicine down his throat seemed to have worked, because he’s drinking today and less cranky pants. He’s napping now, and has been down 2 hours, which is twice as long as he napped yesterday, so fingers crossed he’s on the mend. Because I am not. I feel asstastic! Gonna take a nap myself I think when the hubs gets home.

 

The brokeness is wearing thin. I miss having disposable income. Less than 2 years until the big credit card is paid off, though, then we will have money again. Hanging in there…

Eating Should Be Easier November 2, 2011

Yes, yes, I know eating is easy. Trust me, I got lots of ass testifying to the fact that I know eating is easy. However, that abundance of rump is also my evidence that knowing what to eat can be very, very complicated.

Recently I embarked on a 10 day juice fast. At the end, I felt pretty good. My RA was not terrible. I had lost a good deal of weight. It did me right. But, only a few days after my fast ended I was in the accident and all (yes, ALL) benefits were immediately nullified. At this point my RA is right back where it was, and my weight is darn close (and it came on OVERNIGHT which = water weight). After the juice fast it was my intention to maintain a primarily veggie/vegan’ish diet. I was going to allow a couple of meals a week for splurges but the majority of meals were to be plant based.

Not only was that my intention, it’s what I did. Really. No, really. Yes, in the time immediately following the accident we had a few more splurge meals than I prefer to admit, but… as soon as I was able we were back to mama making salads for dinner every night and the splurges were cut back to truly 2-3 meals a week. Proof of this? My husband has lost 35 pounds in the last month. I have not.

So, what conclusion do I draw from this information? It would appear the plant centric diet doesn’t really agree with my body. But, but, but!!! There is so much evidence that plant diets are good and omni diets are bad, right? Meat causes acidosis and bone erosion, no? Casein has been PROVEN to grow cancer?!?!?!?!?

Well, I suppose that depends on who you ask. See, I was rather addicted to nutrition documentaries for a while and they all agreed: vegan = good, meat = death. So, I tried. I really tried. Sure, I don’t want to die young and I do want better health, but my primary motivation is giving Baby G the best possible diet from the start. I want him used to the healthiest foods. I want him to have everything he needs to grow up strong and healthy. I want him to have a mama that can play and will live to see his kids.

So, how do we get there? What the hell do I eat to 1) lose weight and 2) improve my health and 3) set a good example for my little man?

I don’t know, either. But, I’m working on it.

A Really Boring List That I Will Totally Understand If You Don’t Read December 13, 2010

The babies are both sleeping! So here is a quick update on the haps at casa Minta!

 

• After thinking about it constantly for a couple of days, I did decide to test. It was negative. Well, G says it was negative. I am insane and always see some kind of shadow line. Well, this time it was there, then it wasn’t, then it came back. Which means I am insane. Because even when I don’t really-really-really want to see a line, apparently my brain still wants to see a line.
• I will be 31 on Wednesday. Boo! But also, yay. I’m feeling a little odd about my birthday this year.
• Enbrel has been restarted. RA relief has happened almost immediately. Oh, right, I never told you… I have been having the worst RA pain of my life since about 8 weeks postpartum. I have been living on the steroids, which has slowed the weight loss way the heck down So, I saw the rheumy and now am back on the drugs. Am starting to feel better already. She had thought it might take months…
• Prednisone step down here we come!
• Hopefully weight loss will pick back up.
• Have now lost 72 pounds! Which is only two pounds since last time I told you, a month ago. Hence the joy at the pednisone going way.
• Wii Fit has been resumed. I was too fat for it for a while (even not pregnant…) but now am back on track with it!

An End is In Sight August 25, 2010

K, I’m  cheater and I’ve decided that even though this is about yesterday… it’s still “my day in great detail” so welcome to both an update AND day 25 of the 30 day blog journal.

So, I had a big day yesterday. I had an appointment with DW, then I got to come home and deal with plumbers, then I got to talk to a restoration company, then I made dinner (got shot down for sex anyway) and then I had to stick a bunch of pills up my cooter. Guess which part was the most fun?!?!?!

The hell? you ask.

Well, let’s start at the beginning. I woke up and took a shower, because you know, when doctors are going to be in your bits, the bits should be clean. While I was in the shower, G went to the basement. Probably to rub it in my face that he’s allowed up and down stairs and I’m not. But, he found a surprise down there… Standing water! Coming back up though the drain hole in the floor, and the old potty that doesn’t work in the corner. Gross!!! Because as we know water coming from those two places isn’t JUST water, it’s dunh, dunh, dunh… sewage. Eww! OK, I didn’t know that, but G kindly explained it to me.

So, he comes back upstairs and tells me not to freak and get my pressure all jacked up, but I need to not ask to be induced, because I need to come home and call plumbers and shit. To which I say, “fuck that, yo’ mama can let in the plumber, shiiit.” ‘Cause I am ghetto fab at 8am. So he’s all, “O-Kay, but I don’t think you fully grasp the situation down there.” But, we had no more time to argue. He had to go to work and I had to go the doctors office.

And, I did. But first, I needed an NST. Apparently, mah baybee knows how to hide his heart in my fat very effectively, because the poor nurse had to hold the doppler the whole time. Unfortunately, she rendered the contraction monitor useless, but I didn’t bitch about it, because he was being very assy and moving on her a lot. It took an hour to get 20 minutes of him on the monitor. It took 10 minutes to get 10 kicks. I tried explaining that 9:30am was playtime, and we’d be better off to do the AFI first, but I am only dumb patient, so I was overruled. After the NST I went over the u/s room for an AFI and his fluid was up to 10 from 8.5. So hunky dorrey there. Also of note, my BP was 113/89.

I was devastated. There was no way with yummy squirmy baby, and improved fluids and damn near normal BP readings that DW was going to induce me now. Motha Flipaship!

But… I headed up the musty old elevators anyway. I called G and told him the news and he was thrilled because “major plumbing emergency” blah, blah, blah… Then I peed in a cup, because that’s what I do at DW’s office. Then a nurse told me I looked like shit. Well, she actually might have said “Oh honey, you look tired” but I heard “Gee whiz, bitch, what’d you do? Sleep in a dumpster?” Then she dipped my pee and took my BP.Which was… 149/103. The fuck? She asked how I was feeling and I told her I was losing my mind in the bed and I was losing my identity and the days were running together, turns out she just wanted to know about headaches and blurred vision. So, I gave her the short story: yes and no.

Then DW came in, looked at my chart and said “let’s have a baby, get nekkid” and I was “oooh, finally somebody wants to do me” but he just wanted to check mt cervix. At this point I feel I should note: I was going to have a baby yesterday if only that bitch cervix would play ball. Obviously the fact that I’m writing that instead of, “look, shiny new baby” means that my cervix is a sell out whore. I don’t know how much G paid her to double cross me, but I’m going to make her pay…

Anyhoo, DW checked the cervix and while I was “a tad” dilated, she was long and firm. Which is kick ass awesome from weeks like 4-34. But she should now be ripening on her own. I think this assumption is based on ladies that are getting a steady supply of prostaglandins, this lady is not. So DW starts thinking out loud (still wrist deep in my snatch, BTW) about our options. I swear he was tickling the baby’s head, whatever he was doing, it hurt. He was saying things like “we need to find a good reason to deliver, but the cervix just isn’t favorable, but the BP is all over the map, but we don’t want to end up doing a c-section.” He then pulled his hand out of my cooch and recommended that I come back on Friday and do another NST and he’d check my cervix again. He also told me to try some techniques to help ripen my cervix, specifically Evening Primrose oil taken orally and poon-erly. As I can’t exactly put the cervix in a paper bag on the counter, like a pear (yes, I envision my cervix as a rock hard pear), I had to come home and google additional ways to ripen it.

I did stop and get the EPO and some new lip balm. Unfortunately, lip balm had lanolin in it and yeah, now my lips itch and the skin is peeling off! Fucking lanolin!

Then I came home and had to call the plumber. The plumber got there in like 40 minutes! Hooray. And he was nice! And he fixed my slow running tub, and, you know, the problem causing the sewage in the basement for only like $300. The plumber kicked ass. Apparently, we had tree roots in the main drain. I don’t know how that’s possible, but, ’tis what he said. He cleaned up his mess and called a lady who specializes in this kind of clean up for me. Again, hooray plumber!

Then I had to call G with an update. He was not so pleased with having a cleanup specialist come by. So, he came up with a Plan B and Plan C and stressed my shit out calling me every few minutes to talk about it. Grrr… Yeah, I did not want to deal with it anymore for another hour until the lady came. Turns out the situation down there was not as bad as I was envisioning and but the restoration chick wants $1,700 up front, and requires a bunch of work after the fact to replace the carpet. So, now, G is going to do the cleanup himself. But, the restoration lady stayed a long time and put on a strong sales pitch.

Then I made dinner when she left. It was OK. G really liked it. So, I mentioned that I did some research on cervix ripening and I need to bathe the cervix in prostaglandins and he happened to have a very good source of prostaglandins and oxytocin. He decided to go shopping instead. Ouch! Shot down.

So, I got out the breast pump for a Plan B. Because you know breast pump, sex, same diff, right?

Then my Mom called to talk about my sisters shower. So I told her how I’d have the cake, diaper cake and my presents etc… delivered Thursday night or Friday morning. Apparently she also is unaware that PIH/Pre-eclampsia are not just for fat people. I had to remind her that what I have used to be called toxemia and she had it with me and she was not this fat, so this is not a direct result of my being too fat to have a baby.

Then G came back from shopping and I proposed getting fresh again… but unfortunately he was not game. Apparently my pregnant ass grosses him out and he’s not interested in actual sex with me. Whatever… I have more to say, but won’t because I’m just ragging because my feelings are hurt.

Deciding that I still needed to get some prostaglandins on my cervix I stuck three Evening Primrose Oil pills up my pillbox and went to bed.

Minta the Grouch April 8, 2010

So, I saw the dietitian this week. Something that probably should have been newsworthy, but alas my writing mojo and also energy levels are conspiring against my blogging habits. Also, some people dumped me this week Which bummed me out a little. But, I must say, I’ve dumped many a pregnant broad my damn self, so I should shut up and deal with it. But, I must admit that I do have a little bit of an unpopular girl side to me (which is odd considering that in high school I was actually quite popular, just not a member of the cool kids clique, although I was friends with and socialized with kids from just about every clique in school), I always feel a bit left out and like people are talking about me behind my back. So, when I don’t get views/comments or followers dump me, I sometimes take it far too personally. Especially considering that this is more of a journal than actual account of anything that is terribly interesting to anyone who isn’t me. Anyhoo, I’ve decided to get out of my funk and write even though my mojo is still missing.

So, what’s up?

- Dietitian: I saw her. She was nice. She was complementary about my weight gain (18 weeks & 5lbs, go me!). She said I was eating OK. She was not a fan of my meatless ways (so not a real vegetarian, just kind of grossed out by the smell and look of meat these days). She gave me a diet that is way too much food. Which brought light to the fact that my weight gain is so small because I’m not really eating enough. Because I’m not hungry anymore. Hey, I’ve got more than enough blubber to feed the Sproutling for a few months! (Yes, I KNOW that not REALLY how it works.)

- Grouchiness: I gots it. Big freaking time. Maybe it’s the new carb free (not really) diet. Maybe it’s the hormones. Maybe it’s the fact that this week I realized that I have to get this thing back out of my body!!! Maybe it’s because G is scared of me being scared. Maybe it’s because I’ve been getting a lot of snide little comments from people. Maybe it’s because I have to pierce my skin six times a day with a dull needle. Or maybe it’s all of the above.

- Work: THE SUCK… Also, in looking at finances: scary, ow, scary, don’t want to be disciplined!

- Finances: Actually not as bad as stated above, just very frightened at the prospect of losing all of that disposable DINK cash that’s been allowing us to pretty much do whatever we want. So frightened that there’s been talk of my working part time. Or, taking in some kids during the week. Like the C’s x3 (You know, Big C, Little C and New We’re Assuming C). Oy F’ing Vey!

- Pregnancy: I feel kicks everyday now!!! So ecstatic!!! Big appointments on Monday!!! Hopefully there will be an inney/outey announcement soon!!!!

OK, am now taking sugar before I pitch my salad and go for a shake! (Before you judge me… my after breakfast sugar was 80, I obviously need some carbs!)

More to come on IDK more stuff, later

***** Update: Feeling far more justified in breaking my diet. My after lunch reading was 74. This diet obviously does not agree with me. *****

Houston, we have a negative June 18, 2009

I found the downside to the bariatric surgery! It’s expensive! and my insurance won’t pay it. At all. It’s listed as an exclusion. Here is an instant replay from my call with Anthem BCBS:

Me: Hi I would like to know if Bariatric Surgery is covered under my plan?
Anthem Chick: Nothing is covered under your shitty plan, but I’ll look anyway… Yeah, no.
Me: Like no, not ever, or like you need more info to prove medical necessity?
AC: No, not ever.
Me: So, let’s say I were dying and my doctor said the only way to save my life would be to perform a Roux-en-Y gastric bypass, still no coverage?
AC: It’s listed as an exclusion, so no.

Anthem sucks ass.

So, G will be happy, anyway. He was very anti surgery.

FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OK, all done. Now, I have to go help set up a shitty work party and smile all evening. My face might break.

New Home June 17, 2009

So, here we are. All moved in to our new blog home. I haven’t been able to make it all nice and sunggly, yet, but I’ll try this weekend. I was so proud of myself for getting the other one glammed up!

Quick update on the me front… I had the sleep study and they found that my oxygen nose dives in the night (down to 86), so the sleep doc prescribed O2 at night. I have to a machine delivered and everything. Scary.

The bariatric consult is tonight. I’m feeling more like I will probably do this if the insurance approves it. I keep reading articles that say how good it is for insulin resistance, and how many women are getting the surgery, then going on to have healthy babies without the fertility treatments.

I want to be healthy and happy. That’s what I want, it just seems like every time I turn around something else is wrong. All of the something else’s come down to two things 1) Insulin or 2) Auto-immune. There are new studies that show the surgery can help with both.

I can’t allow myself to hope for my RA to get better. But, even if just the insulin stuff got better, and I lost weight as a result that would save impact on my joints. So even if the RA wasn’t better at all and I still had to take the immune suppression drugs, it should slow down the joint destruction and reduce the need for steroids. Which would help the insulin stuff even more.

I’m having a hard finding a downside other than, oh yeah I could die. Or, end up totally wacked getting fed through a tube in the nursing home or something. But, the truth is, that just doesn’t happen so much anymore. This surgery is more safe than most general open surgeries because the doctors who do it, do the same three or four procedures 100′s of times a year. Most can be done laproscopically, now, too.

The other downside of course, is the complete and permanent change in lifestyle. But, that’s really only scary because it’s unknown. I don’t know what it feels like to not be able to eat what I want when I want, so it’s scary. I keep thinking of the no alcohol afterwards as a negative, too, but… truth be told I’ve had maybe 10 drinks in the last year. Most of those were right after the miscarriage and of those, I really only enjoyed one or two. I have lost my taste for booze.

So, that’s the update. Sorry it wasn’t witty or funny, I’ll try to be back to myself by tomorrow!

I Love the Snow January 29, 2009

Really, I do.

But not the ice. Definitely, not the ice.

One of the wonderful parts of living in Ohio, is that a couple of times a year we get real snow. It’s so pretty and so much fun. Big C and Uncle G are going sledding tomorrow and hopefully I’ll have my snowman done tonight. Yes, I’m the big dork playing out in the snow all by m’lonesome. This, you see, is why I needs some kiddies. It’s not dorky to build a snowman with your kids.

So, the snow, thumbs up! The ice, no… no thumbs for ice.

This morning, I was 1.5 hours late for work. Being that we have flex time and my boss is in Hawaii etc… it’s not a huge big deal, but I’d rather not be late. As I’m sure you’ve guessed by now, the ice was responsible for the late. Boo! So what happened that’s so blog-worthy?

Right, G got the snow off of my windows this morning, but I had ice caked up .5-1 inch thick all over the windows, too. So, I decided to let the car run for a while to melt the under layer of ice, allowing me to lift it off in sheets. This method works, I’ve done it before. So while it’s running I’m showering and feeding the dogs and packing lunch, yay. You know all the morningly stuff I do. Then I go out and scrap the ice. For like 25 minutes. But it all came off, yay! So, then I go back into the house to get my laptop and lunch etc… come out, lock the door and go to get into the freshly de-iced vehicle.

But no, the vehicle is locked.

With my keys inside of it. My house keys and my car keys…

Now, I’m stuck outside, armed with only my wallet and cell phone. So I call, G, no answer. Call again, no answer. Yikes! What to do stuck outsides in the freezingness of the snow? Luckily G calls back! But is of no help. The man is in Indiana, and has taken the “hidden” outside key back inside. Oh noes! Then I think, maybe I can hoist my fat ass through one of the windows, if there’s one unlocked. Thankfully, there is! And it’s a low one! (OK, bad, but good right now!) So I manage to shimmy the window open from the outside side and somehow manage to get my fat ass up and over and in, all the while being attacked on one side by the pug. Well, maybe not “attacked” but definitely, distracted and jumped on. So now, I’m back in my house, but still keyless. Luckily, G left my spare remote off of his keychain so I could use it to unlock the car door and finally get to work.

Totally crazy!