Life Family and the Pursuit of Sanity

or… adventures in infertility and babies and family drama!

The One in Which I Rant on Behalf of a Super-Fertile January 8, 2012

Want to hear a surprise? I’m pissed about something. Shocking, yes?


Here’s the deal… I’m sure you’ve all heard the the Duggar family lost their 20th child mid-second trimester. For some reason the entire world at large feels the need to voice their opinion on how this is all their own fault. Every person with a keyboard feels the need to criticize their family and reproductive choices. It was bad enough before the memorial service, but now there’s even more shit to throw because this grieving family had memorial photo’s made of their baby and *gasp* displayed them at that child’s memorial service.


I do not understand for one second how anyone whose name is not Michelle (or Jim Bob) Duggar can think Michelle Duggar’s reproductive choices are their business. Furthermore how it is anyone’s business how these people choose to grieve for or memorialize their child? On what planet is it OK to offer criticism rather than sympathy for a family in pain? Sure they’ve made lives public and because of that they are subject to asshats being asshatty, but MY F’ING GOD what kind of MONSTER DOUCHE judges a grieving family like that?


They made decisions that you wouldn’t have? Hey guess what?!?!?!?!? That’s their right! They have a right to have as many kids as they want. They have a right to raise those children however they want. You know what else? Should the worst happen, they have the right to grieve and memorialize HOWEVER THEY WANT. The absolute only appropriate response is to convey condolences to the family.


OK, I think that’s it. Sorry if that was a bit disjointed. I’m just really pissed at the public outpouring of judgment and criticism towards people who just need the EXACT OPPOSITE of that right now.


4 Responses to “The One in Which I Rant on Behalf of a Super-Fertile”

  1. Krystal Says:

    Preach it! I believe I posted on facebook about this very thing. Drives me crazy!

  2. Thank you! … also me too! GAH! people are so rude!

  3. AMEN!!!! I can not BELIEVE the sheer audacity of people to judge in a time like this- these poor people are heartbroken and grieving!! If one of their older children was involved in a motor vehicle accident- would the same people go “it’s their own fault- that’s what they get for having so many children?” I highly doubt it!! GAH!! It makes me so mad to see how people can be so cruel to another person.

  4. Mrs. Gamgee Says:


    I am absolutely disgusted by the general attitude that people have toward the Duggars (yeah, they have a lot of kids, but you know what? They have worked it out that they can afford to raise them, and raise them well. They aren’t a drain on anyone’s tax dollars and they are good kids who are respectful and thankful for what they have! Sorry… bit of a tangent), and this situation in particular.

    What bothers me most are the people who question her intelligence because it was a missed miscarraige (as in “How could she not know she miscarried?”). People who have never experienced a loss of this magnitude have absolutely no right to judge her!

    And lastly, about the memorial pics… I don’t think it’s a choice I would make, but I haven’t been in that position. However that doesn’t change that it was their choice as parents and no one else has the right to condemn them for their choice.

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