Life Family and the Pursuit of Sanity

or… adventures in infertility and babies and family drama!

How Much Is Too Much February 27, 2014

You remember a while back I was all “Ooh, mah parenting style is the suck. Must. Fix.” Well, I was. It was. Major changes were made. Major.


We are now an unschooling, peaceful parenting, anarchy leaning Libertarian family. For real. That means we learn, but don’t have a set curriculum. We don’t punish. At all. And, yeah, the political stuff. That’s mostly me. G is still a morality legislating right winger. We’re working on winning him over from the dark side.


Part of unschooling, at this age is exposing Lil G to a variety of experiences and subjects so that we can help direct his interests as he gets old enough to start career planning. Try as we might the boy has exactly one interest: the ocean, with several sub interests: Antarctica and the Arctic circle.┬áPrimarily, he’s interested in leopard seals. Orcas and sharks have their places. He can tell you a chromis from a tang from a parrot fish (those are all tropical fish, BTW, in case, like me, you have no clue what a chromis is). But, he loves. I mean loves leopard seals. A favorite game is pretending there are hundreds of “annoying penguins” hatching and he is the leopard seal that has to eat them all. Also, my three year old roots for the predators when watching Happy Feet (he also roots for Darth Vadar when watching Star Wars and Loki when watching the Avengers). So far, we’ve been rocking the Antarctic obsession for nearly two years. Pretty much since he first saw Happy Feet.


Recently, I was informed that he is going to get a wife when he grows up and they are going to have 3-4 children (this number changes) and he is going to move to Antarctica to “learn about leopard seals.” Daddy and I have to move with him, though, so I can help his wife “take care of all those babies.”


So, I did what any loving, unschooling mama would do. I took my kid to meet Paul Nicklen (he is a Nat Geo photog specializing in the poles with an affinity for leopard seals). During his presentation Mr. Nicklen mentioned that for $40k you too can swim with leopard seals. It was a joke. A. JOKE. A concept which my three year old does not get. The child is dead for real trying to save $40k in his piggy banks.


Obviously, we can’t take a small child to Antarctica. At least not on a swim with leopard seals expedition. Not least of all because Mommy is tropical. But also, he’s too small and would freeze to death and frankly I don’t trust the top predator of the south pole not to eat my child regardless of what “Nicklen says.” (Nicklen has been declared “cooler than Spiderman.”) But, a cruise is possible. We could probably all three do a cruise for $25k’ish. Why the hell am I even seriously considering this? I don’t have $25k for a vacation. I don’t have $25k period. If I did, we’d be a two car family.


But, if it’s his dream? If he wants to grow up to be the next highest regarded leopard seal expert in the world, I have to support that right? When is it too early to start?


Then again, he’s also pissed at polar bears for sometimes eating narwhals and wants to go to AK and “stop them from doing that.” And, AK is far more affordable.


I’m a crazy person, right? He’s three.


She Works, But Mostly From Home February 21, 2014

Filed under: Baby G,Money? What Money? — arminta @ 4:34 am

So, you may have caught from a post or two ago that I was away from home in the middle of the night (as I am right now). Not to worry, I’ve not turned to whoring it up. It’s much worse than that. I got a job. My oldest nephew asked me to come work at his hotel so he didn’t have to cover night audit anymore. And I thought “Oh cool! I can stay up two nights a week for a paycheck that doesn’t involve missing waking hours with le boy.”


Also, though, I am doing some work/work from home. Some people I used to work with contacted me when my non-compete was up and there is a small politically affiliated company for whom I’m doing some work.


Why the switch from “mommy only” to WAHM+? Honestly, it was Lil G’s perception of me. I wanted him to know that his mama is more than just cuddles and snacks and water refills. I am those things. But that’s not all. He needs to know that. Because he needs to know his wife is more. He needs to know his friends are more.


Also, without Ladybug terrorizing my every free minute 50 hrs a week, I was getting bored. You’d think I had enough to be getting on with, but apparently I’ll do anything to get out of doing the dishes.


The Stupid, It Hurts February 20, 2014

Filed under: Big C,Family — arminta @ 7:38 am

This happened yesterday, on Facebook. Because, that’s where I live, now.


Big C: This movie is sooo scary and could happen for real! –Feeling: Scared, Watching: Vacancy

  • Me: WHAT?!?!?!?! Who is letting you watch that?!!? Turn it off!
  • Him: Aunt Wiccan is letting me watch it. It’s fine…
  • Me: Grrr…
  • His older brother: Turn it off! That’s totally inappropriate for you, and you JUST said you were scared.
  • Aunt Wiccan: Relax… he was born desensitized. LOL He hasn’t even jumped.


Being an older movie, I’m gonna guess no one’s gonna get pissed at “spoilers” being posted… the plot is a couple of creepy dudes lure people to a hotel, then brutally and suspensefully murder them and record it and sell it as murder porn. Of course, our hero and heroine are the ones who finally thwart their evil plans, which means, they get a double dose of horror.


Big C is 10.


I was 27 when I saw this movie, it still haunts me. Because, as he pointed out, it could happen. It’s not a fantasy based movie like dolls coming to life, or super natural dream killers. It is crazy balls realistic.


Also, Big C needs someone to go pee with him at night. So, kiss my ass he’s desensitized. Also, wouldn’t a desensitized 10 year old be a bad thing? Where were the younger kids? How much of this shit did they see?


Yeah, this is ignorance my sister thinks is “great” for her kids. I swear to piss I’d like to smack them all. The worst part is, although I took care of this child from the time he was born until he was 7.5, I have no say. I have no voice. They are ruining my baby, but he’s not mine. I want my baby back.


The Fear: It Continues February 14, 2014

Filed under: Baby G,The Fear — arminta @ 5:25 am
Tags: ,

You know how I spent my whole pregnancy with Lil G terrified of a miscarriage? Then, I was scared of crazy things like his car seat sliding down the driveway into oncoming traffic? Then, I was scared that I was screwing him up?

Well, I got over that shit. It took time. It took a lot of self talk. OK, I am still a little scared of the oncoming traffic. Pet Semetary, anyone? (In case you’re unaware that is the way the book title is spelled, I didn’t forget how to spell.)

The fear du Jour is brought to us by the St. Jude’s children’s hospital commercials. Been seeing a lot of these commercials lately. Do I know it’s irrational? Sure. Does my brain care? Nope.

I just wanna go home and snuggle my boy… Oh well, couple more hours, then I’ll go home and snuggle the shit out of that kid. Then he will go a his Grandma’s, by himself, all day for the first time ever. So I can sleep. Who wants to bet the St. Jude’s fear really stems from Mama having separation anxiety?